Today is a new day.

Every new beginning comes from some other beginning’s end.

                            - Closing Time (1998) - Semisonic

Yes. My life’s long pessimism at reality has been confused with what is really my life’s long pragmatism, learned in my mid-20s by being dirt poor, in extremely massive credit card debt, living pay check to paycheck, surviving othe barest of things, and having to figure out every day and every year how to live what became my adult life.

It is not something that cannot be taught by your parents.

Not taught by Grandparents.

Not taught by any book or classroom exercise.

It can only be learned by living.

It is not easy.

In the great scheme of things nothing about life ever really is.

My nihilism, while very much rooted in the core of my Slavic firmware, can also be easily misconstrued by many for what it is not.

In my 55 years, I have truly learned only one consistent thing of this existence.

One recurring thing that all humans share, but often fail to truly grasp and often hide from when it is in plain sight.

And that is?

All things change.

And all things end.

And the wheel turns ever onwards.

Everything.

I mean, it is obvious isn’t it?

Every day.

But very few who have existed truly grasp this. Truly live it.

So I am going to view this change in my life as the gift it is.

I’ve been given the gift of not having a choice in the matter of extricating myself from a situation that has declined into corporate house of cards over the past 5 years.

Not having a choice in the matter of extricating myself where I allowed myself to become complacent and believe that my hard work, professionalism, skills, and talents would be recognized and allow me some sense of work enjoyment.

That has been a lie since 2016 when things started to go downhill where I was. The enshittification started to really set in and most of us, happy in thinking we were secure, just accepted it and tried to get through every day. One day at a time.

Those who cared either retired, left, or were terminated.

But clearly, decades of high performance reviews, awards, and other recognition are utterly meaningless.

We allow ourselves to think there is security in them.

There isn’t.

None at all.

They are transitory for one moment and forgotten in the next.

And so I am accepting this change.

I am accepting this ending.

And I am on the wheel that remains ever turning.

“Every new beginning comes from some other beginning’s end.”

Ra is always up there shining upon us.

Even when there clouds are overcast, Ra is there waiting to shine on me us.

Today is a new day.

And in many ways, I am free.